Dating In Later Life Gifts

'Your place or mine?'

"This place is one of New York's best-kept secrets."

"You're crappin' in the closet again, Claude."

"Sometimes I wish I could just jump into the dryer and come out wrinkle-free!"

"But, doctor, what are the advantages of living longer?"

"I see Joe Bosco passed away." "Yeah. I heard he laid down the boogie and played that funky music til he died."

'Sorry Henry, but I'm looking for something a little more permanent.'

"Two, please—one senior and one tootsie."

Old Love

"You're getting more wrinklier, grandpa. You should drink more water."

"The Doctor says it's very rate for the superannuated to get taller."

'I still have all my own teeth.'

Impulse dating. A really bad idea.

"The fact that you rely on a teleprompter is a good indication that you need to work on your communication skills."

"When I die, I'd like to die having sex..."

'Did someone say something?'

Old man has a walking stick case.

Internal Clocks.

'Someone told him life begins at forty. Now he's reserving his energies!'

An elderly woman with a heart-shaped ear trumpet

'Don't be too sad. Sure, she was special, but there are plenty more fish in the sea.'

Oldies.

"Shall I compare thee to an autumn day?"

Same Sexless Marriage

Elderly Dating

'Tell me about yourself. How long have you been dead?'

'Aha, the vitamins for seniors swaps additives for preservatives.'

"You only started bringing me home from the Darby and Joan club because I had a stair life and you couldn't manage stairs any more."

"Agnes is so crushing on him."

"I have two children from a previous economic cycle."

"This is Norman - eighty-seven and never a mid-life crisis in his life."

"Thank you for the lovely dinner, Perry. Would you like to come in for a stool softener?"