Dating Game Fan Gifts

'Ok, Bachelor number 2: What's your idea of a perfect first date?'

"She's just being Koi."

'I take playing footsie very seriously, Jane. You may have won the first two rounds, but let's make it three out of five.'

Joe Hundredaire

"The dinner date was a disaster! I realised he was still a "Mama's Boy" when I saw he was expecting me to regurgitate his food..."

Cards Blind Dating Game

"There's something different about you."

"I fancy tall men."

"But it's supposed to be recreational sex, not guilt sex."

"He's in his late somethings, but he's cute."

"The date was a disaster: he grew up with pirates you see, so I couldn't understand half of what he was saying..."

'My perfume? Actually, it's called 'insect repellent' but at the moment it doesn't seem to be working.'

'Well David Chuck, let's see your ideal partner...'

'My ad said I was 'blond with curves' it didn't say anything about me being a woman.'

'Alright, alright - you win this row. Let's make it best out of three.'

'Oh yeah? Well step outside to my hotel room and say that.'

"If you won't let me pay for dinner, at least let me pay for sex later."

"Oh, Harold would never divorce me. I hold the key to his heart. . . and one to a certain safety deposit box!"

'I'm 50 percent lovable and 50 percent bitch. Don't push it.'

"Listen, if this horn really worked as an aphrodisiac I wouldn't be spending all my money on dating websites, now would I?"

"You were right! 'Love' means nothing to him."

"You've got a new boyfriend - mummy has too!"

'Don't take it personally Dave, I'm just not into guys with ponytails.'

Mona Lisa in a bar: 'Forget it, Ted...she's way out of your league!'

'Mind if I borrowed my medical history chart? I've got a blind date tonight.'

'I've got a moth who's very keen to meet a light bulb.'

'I finally found Mr Right!'

Never say you don't have a girlfriend.

'And she needs to be a complete bitch.'