Dating Dilettantes Pillows

"You know how last year you told me you'd teach me how to pick up ladies?"

'Damn, this guy swiped my pick up line.'

'How was my date?...It went OK. He paid for dinner, and he floats. I suppose that has to count for something.'

"Beat it buster! I only fancy bad boys."

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

Garlic Free Zone.

'We're not at home, Stu. You can't just order 'I don't care'.'

'Tomato ketchup?' 'Well you wanted the house red.'

'House wine?'

"Let's start with a couple of glasses of water and if that goes well I'll order two coffees."

"Forget it - she's out of your league."

Mayhem, Inc. Part 2

"Do you mind if I not listen while you talk?"

The Salvador Deli

'What superpower would I like? Normally, invisibility, but as I'm a 53 year old female, I feel that I've already been granted it.'

"Would you prefer sparkling water, filtered water, tap water or water?"

'Okay, okay. On second thought, maybe going on a diet isn't necessary.'

'Erm...I ordered the omlette!'

"Past performance is no guarantee of future results."

"Dating advice from your old man? Ew, weird. Instead, let's ask Stinky Rick."

"Remember, I'm 'catch and release'."

'Are you fit, attractive male...?'

Rusty and Molly's first date was going beautifully until the 'car tyre incident.

"'Scuse me, Officer, but where do the elite meet to eat around here?"

The singles bar...

"Of course, you understand you can't possibly stay here tonight."

"So how was your date with Smiley?"

I had a great time tonight, and I'd like to see you again in 4-6 months. When doctors date.

'You don't do faith healing do you?'

'I sure hope this 'timeout' thing is just a phase with Mom.'

'Ambiance or non-ambiance?'

Winooski - A camp for sort of gifted boys.

Chinese noodles.

Good knight ... sweet prince. She's trying to decide who to date.

'If you're ready, who wants to go first?'