Date-night Analyzer T-Shirts

"Can't you forget you're a teacher for one evening?"

"This is the perfect way to watch movies if you love mosquitoes and having a cold, wet butt."

"And I'll also take my steak raw thank you."

"Honey, do these sweatpants make me look like I prefer we stay in tonight so I can watch the game?"

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

Wine Selection 'Here we are. Our cheapest house wine. Would the gentleman care to smell the twisty cap?'

Dating is so expensive...

"Can you romance me after my tiramisu?"

'So, what's for dinner ...a séance?'

'One more for me an Tiffany, and one more for you and the road.'

'Tomorrow we'll look back on this as a night to remember.'

Funnel of Love

'Harvey, did you notice what a beautiful full moon we have tonight?'

"They haven't mated yet, but I think we're getting close."

'A rose tattoo for your lady friend sir?...' A female Tattooist offering a rose tattoo, in the way of the old Rose Ladies in clubs and pubs

scrabble love

'You wanted to go on a romantic outing. You're on a romantic outing.'

"It's a Haiku Dinner."

"What kind of biscuits are they?"

"Would you prefer the talking or the non-talking section?"

"I think we've had too much Wine. The cork-screw is surrendering."

'And I love you too, darling, but there's the lust to think of.'

'We'll start with a menu and a glass of water.'

"Your press kit said you were lots of fun."

Heart to heart talk.

"What do you mean it could've been better?"

Romance

Love Trap

"No, I don't still think about him - I'm with YOU now."

"Mine says this relationship will never work out and I should dump you right now!"

"The cheek of him! At the end of the first date, he wanted me to go to his home to roost!"

Film Lovers.

"A word of advice, sir...when your wife reaches for another slice of pizza, never, ever say, 'Are you sure you should be eating that?'"