Date Night Navigator T-Shirts

Trapeze artist with very long arms

'Son, you just got your first credit card and you're going on a date. My advice: keep it in your pants.'

'Are you ready to be patronised yet?'

"You're not working as a crossing guard now, Brenda."

"Damn. I took the Rip Van Nyquil."

'Of course I'm out of touch with reality. That's what I came here for.'

He was a nerd. But he was her nerd.

'This is your idea of hitting the local hotspots?'

'The guy at the end of the bar, would like to know if he can get you to buy him another drink?'

'The landscape is continually shifting Son, so you have to learn to navigate by the Sun and the stars...'

"There must be a place we can wait on line for an hour before eating."

"It's an app that lets me know when I'm bored."

A Sandbar piles of sand in a bar enjoying their night out

'I can't sleep. I'm too awake.'

"I don't know 'where I've been all of your life', but wherever it was, I wish I was there now!"

"I'm floating in pure vodka; feel free to dip your glass in if you'd like."

"I know it's our first date and we're at this fancy restaurant and all, but would it be a red flag if I ordered the chicken fingers?"

'The gentleman at the end of the bar would like to buy you an aphrodisiac.'

'The blond guy is a forward and the other guy is a wing.'

Club insecurity.

'That guy is SO tacky.'

'Oh, no! The monster under my bed is my brother!'

'Just one more and this puppy is headed for another bar.'

"They must be having a two-for-one promotion tonight."

'Your place or mine? Both. You go to your place and I'll go to mine!'

'Don't even think about it!'

"I love college."

'Have a couple of dreams, and call me in the morning.'

"I can't cook, but I can pay."

"It's a jolly drinking song but I can't make it past the first few bars."

Animals looking at a map of the crops on a farm.

Joe's Bar, Under New Joe!

'Mind throwing him back? It's his round...'

'You've had enough!'

Happy hour.