Darth Vader's Nemesis Gifts

"Oh, no. Dude, are WE the bad guys?"

Kitchen Tetris

"And with you on guard, I won't have to worry about that monster under my bed."

"And this Halloween, try not to make a specter of yourself."

'Shakespeare, what do you say we write a comedy?'

'Stamp collecting has gotten more competitive.'

Tonight 'Richard III' a new play by William Shakespeare.

"I'm sick and tired of black."

'Sorry, Dad. My offensive lineman says I don't have to go to bed yet.'

Beep' 'beep' 'beep' 'beep'' - 'Slam!' - 'Great... another long week of pain and humiliation ahead...' - ''Click'' - 'God, Ilove my job.' - '' -

Scraper Biking, Manhattan, Spring, '95

James Earl Jones

"Safe? Of course it's safe! I do fireworks every year!"

Drama Queen.

"Why couldn't you open that wide during the procedure?"

"I can handle the boss's angry looks...it's when he start breathing like Darth Vader."

'Go get the hose, George! That gopher is back!'

'He didn't go for the throat, but close.'

Hunter with Santa Claus as a Trophy

"The boss started me on the bottom. Not in the mail room, but in the office cafeteria washing dishes."

Year of the Seagull: Scarecrow on car's top losing it's battle in chasing gulls away

Don Quixote Update.

Horrible things!

'You know what? I agree with my son's opinion of you.'

England training camp "Keeps 'em out of the nightclubs."

"When the game warden isn't looking, plant this little gun on the duck."

"I did try to advise him against cold water swimming."

Never mess with someone who's having a bad hair day.

Ornithologist: 'I don't do teeth, I tell you! I do birds!'

'Soon you will be here. . .'

Greenies - Eat my carbon!