Damage Control Enthusiast Gifts

'Stand back!...She's cleared out three local stores in the last year.'

"The TV remote? So, I decide what we watch tonight?"

"By labeling it, I control it."

'You'll find there's no middle ground with Kirk Knoland.'

'We've moved some fussy people, but she tops it!'

"Vernon likes an element of danger in a water feature..."

Memorable Travel Adventure: 'I was in Florida, and on a whim, decided to wrestle an alligator.'

'My horoscope says I'm due for a surprise today.'

'What a control freak!'

'It's your remote. Hold on to it. Don't let other people push your buttons.' The kind of help men go for.

Avalanche skiing is a RUSH!

'Don't worry. The first 30 years of being an inspector are the hardest.'

'I have an open-door policy, but only until the air conditioner is repaired.'

Sailor notices a sea mine in his foot bath.

"I am a control freak."

"Mabel, you are becoming a control freak..."

Novel airport noise abatement procedures.

DIY store.

Man with Stop Signs.

Despite hard evidence to the contrary it was still considered lucky to kiss the Blarney Spike

"I should have know he was a control freak when he seduced me in his signal box."

'The food inspector, Sir!'

Crazy Ideas

'Andy, this is Doug. Looks like we're going to have to dip into the reserves earlier than we expected.'

Beaver looking at the Hoover dam thinking 'You've got to be kidding me.'

'We don't want to interfere to much, just a couple of things...what you do and how you do it!'

"I like things to be done my way but by somebody else."

"She says she's from Quality Control. We've failed the furniture inspection."

Micromanager of the Year Award: 'No, you need to present the award from my left...and did you do the awards form 87F, 2012?...'

'Inventions gone bad! Nuclear sparklers.'

Natural Disaster This Way...

Safe sex is not making love with your helmet on.

"Hey, who died and gave you the right to determine my water rights?"

"I hope this isn't another one of your crazy bounce-me-off-the-wall ideas."