Dachshund Fan Gifts

"We went with the burger dog instead of the weiner dog."

Dachshund Chasing a Stretch Limousine

Could I trade in this greyhound for a dachshund? My doctor says I have to slow up.

No littering...

Wiener Dog . . . Dog Wiener

"Now there's something you don't see everyday. How long have you been using dachshunds as sled dogs.?"

Garbage Piñata

Dogs all across town saw fit to teach their owners a little empathy...

'I took your advice and got a long little doggy.'

"Sorry kid, I work alone."

The inner dog emerging from a sausage dog.

'Young Master and I are both turning two: How come I'm so much more mature than he is?'

Museum of Bones

Long Dachshund

'...Basset Hound! Anal sacs!'

Boy weighs puppy: 'Ten... that's 70 in people-pounds, Sparky.'

Dog park. I'm terrible with names, but I'm good with butts.

'The Big Beg Theory'

The Rolling Bones

"Binge-watching squirrels. What are you doing?"

'You wouldn't be very good at petting dachshunds.'

'The ranch-style house is for our wiener dog.'

"Well, when you were called a 'bad dog,' were you publicly harmed?"

'Boy am I going to be pleased when the pregnancy is over...'

A sausage dog shrinking after toileting

'Is he sitting?'

'That's the problem with Dacshunds, you can never tell whether they're coming or going.'

"Kate! Long time, no sniff!"

"Yes, but why did they use a picture that makes me look fat?!"

Dachshund Yoga

'You know Rosco, our species just ain't what it used to be.'

Tiger suddenly realizes he enrolled in the wrong class.

'The problem with being a Chihuahua is that everybody calls me 'Pepe'... My name is actually Humphrey Reginald Windsor the Third...'

"If Timmy Had a Wiener Dog"

'How did you know his name was Fritz?'...