Cybersecurity Buff Gifts

"It's free, but they sell your information."

"Dave! I think the dogs got hold of your E-bay password again!"

The portion of your brain dedicated to passwords.

"I wouldn't get too close. I have a really bad virus."

Computer Safety

Algorithm 'n' Blues

"To retrieve password: Please answer your secret question, which is, 'what is your password?' hahahaha!"

'I can't even remember how I knew who'd been naughty or nice before I discovered hacking.'

'So, are you saying that in the future I shouldn't open any email attachments labeled, 'deadly computer virus'?'

Anti-Spam Software Download.

"That's his hint for remembering the password."

'Hello? IT? Yes, there's been a breach in security and I'm concerned about unauthorised access to my personal details.'

'Computer Virus Season is Here. Get an Anti-Virus for Your Computer!'

'It appears to be a hacker's virus.'

"I couldn't afford an antivirus, so I installed a sneeze guard instead."

'Your session has timed out.'

Early computer hackers.

Data retention?

"You seem nice. Let me check your online profile..."

'Mother's maiden name? First pet? Favourite place?'

"No, your computer didn't get a virus because you sneezed on it. Let's go over clicking on email attachments again, shall we?"

"There's a malware named after us. We don't know anything about hacking, so why tarnish out reputations even more?"

"I realize you've been busy out saving the world, but you should take some time to keep your antivirus software up to date. You've got a ton of viruses."

"I don't care if you hacked us. We don't deliver to Moscow!"

"I can't access my homework because I forgot my password."

"I uploaded all my knowledge from my head into the cloud and unfortunately I forgot the password."

"Our records have been hacked!"

'What a day! Caught between a Wiki leak and a document dump.'

'Do you scan them for viruses?'

'I deleted all of your computer viruses, but as you know doctor, that may allow some resistant viruses to proliferate.'

'Well look, here come the hackers!'

'We suspect someone in this department of Internet piracy.'

The president's lawyers say he has broad powers - surprise! - To do anything he wants in cyberwarfare, including launching a preemptive strike against another nation...

Being held at virtual gun-point.

I read an article online that said the holiday season is the most stressful time of year. I constantly worry about Santa's cyber security. Nobody's gonna get any presents if the naughty/nice database is breached. I'm very concerned that uncertainty about trade and tariff rules could be impacting Santa's supply chain! And with a tight labor market, the elves might be opting to leave the North Pole for better paying jobs in warmer climates! I preferred it when the only thing they worried abou