Cybernetic Philosopher Gifts

Made obsolete by miniaturization.

Robotic Man

"I don't know… Did you try Googling it?"

'I bought him to retrieve my e-mails.'

"I'm trying to Google what I was thinking about twenty minutes ago!"

'What do you mean, I just flunked the Turing test?'

'I have a homepage, therefore I am.'

"I've never read such utter nonsense! There's a guy here reckons we're all living in some kind of computer simulation!"

'...And, from what I understand, they don't have any hard drive at all.'

"Between you, Alexa, and Siri, I'm just in a house surrounded by women who think they know everything."

I downloaded Thoreau's "Civil Disobedience" into it's memory, and now the "command" key isn't working.

"I got connected to the internet!"

"Today we'll examine that age old question of robot accomplishment: programming or processor?"

'What does the internet have against my people?'

"Just remember, kid...whether you post on Facebook, Twitter or YouTube...it's all show biz."

"The answers to the questions you seek could also be found on Google."

One can hardly be expected to solve the riddle of existence without a computer

"Google gets thousands of requests each day to erase links. Most of them seem to go back to my website."

"I've founded my own religion." "Of course you have, Rudy." "It's off to a good start. Already, it's being mocked by people of other faiths." "If history's any guide, within a couple hundred years, it'll be widely accepted and people who don't believe in it will be persecuted." "What are the central tenets of your religion?" "A true Rudian knows that life is suffering, and winning arguments online is salvation."

"I need a pitchfork that's just a pitchfork."

"Siri, are Charlie’s parents to blame for his neurosis?"

Artificial intelligence discovers racism

'All I did was to connect an artificial heart to artificial legs, to an artificial kidney, to...'

The Thinker (with a laptop).

'I've got a highspeed connection and I get spam... therefore I am!'

''The Thinker' is an outdated concept.'

Digito Ergo Sum.

"With all the AI and deep fake technology, I'm not even sure what's real anymore."

"I don't need therapy, but I'm concerned about my avatar. He's pretty screwed up."

Information Macht Frei

Psychology Clinic. Most potent example of solipsism I've ever seen --- he follows himself on Twitter.

"I'm suffering the unbearable loneliness of being right on the internet."

"Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help the Google?"

'When I googled myself, and nothing came up, I began to question my own existence!'

"According to google, yahoo and bing, the meaning of life is 'more data space'."