Cyber Sentry Pillows

Internet Security.

"The report is clear that cyber crime is on the increase, it's a worry."

"Does anyone know anything about spyware?"

"It's so cute when the boss brings his son to work and pretends to let him help out!"

'Mark my word, Walters, this is no ordinary virus.'

"Careful! He knows computers."

"So who is this First pet?"

Cyb-R Safe: Offering the most convincing illusion of on-line security available today!

"Hack back with all you've got!"

"I want one that detects intrusions by hackers, then blows their computers to bits!"

"We've updated our privacy policy...it's so private we can't even tell you."

Computer Crimes

"I've entered your PIN for you. "

"Hacking and eavesdropping are my top skills. I guess you could say I'm a good listener."

"Google gets thousands of requests each day to erase links. Most of them seem to go back to my website."

"My life must really be boring. I asked the guy why he hacked into my social media and he replied that reading it helps him get to sleep a night."

'He knows where the viruses are buried.'

"Remember when, on the Internet, nobody knew who you were?"

'Gimme all your cache!'

"Our system's been cracked. How is that even possible?"

'Hey, somebody's been accessing MY email too!'

"I'm just sitting here collecting vast amounts of metadata. And what are you up to?...Oh, I already know."

"What do you mean 'upgrade' the server? The old one works just fine."

Facebook/Cambridge Analytica Scandal

"Don't mind me, folks, I'm just here for regular system maintenance."

"It's the age-old question of our existence, Bill: 'Why does bad data happen to good computers?'"

"Your call may be monitored by the CIA, NSA, Russians, Chinese, space aliens..."

"Yes, I'm a superhero. I'm not attractive, muscular or charming because I work in the 'cyber crimes' division."

Vacancy at the Ecuadoran Embassy

"Ed always wears a poker face. His specialty is password encryption at the NSA."

"Remember when they used to call it the 'private sector?'"

"You've done it - you've come up with the perfect password."

"They'll never guess how we stole their data."

'Computer crime seems to be on the rise.'

"We know you have better treats than raisins...we hacked your supermarket loyalty card."