Cyber Comical Pillows

Robber trying to break into an online account.

"Greetings, I'm the bluebird of dank memes."

"....and then it turned out that the e-mail I ignored that I got from the Nigerian bank offering me £200 million was REAL!"

'Look dear, he's burning his first illegal download to rewritable dvd'

"They don't appear to want to take over. They just want to dance."

Nerd emergency: tongue stuck to frozen PC screen.

'It's not working because it claims it can think and has decided not to.'

'I don't want to be a shepherd. I want to be the policeman who interrupts the play to tell all the mummys and daddys who have parked irresponsibly and dangerously outside to move their cars...'

"The Internet puts the world at your finger tips."

"I.T. says these new laptops they gave us come loaded with all the latest viruses."

"Sale. Save 100% of your energy by closing this website. Close now. No, thanks."

"Lemonade App: $1"

'Grandpa says that, in his day, he had to walk 20 miles in the snow just to steal music.'

'This pacifier looks like a cell phone to make the inevitable transition that much easier.'

"You have exceeded the maximum number of incorrect password attempts."

"How do you think that makes Gail feel, knowing her only dog is posting naked pictures of herself all over the internet?"

"It killed on social media yet you say it's horrible?" "Lousy is lousy."

"I thought about having children, until I found out they take nine months to download."

"How come all your alcohol is behind a paywall?"

'What's the point? We're never going to be able to compete with online piracy.'

"Read the comments, boss. . . we should rename the whole thing from 'social media' to 'antisocial media'."

"Lets take this conversation off line..."

STRIP Hambone: 'Can't you programme this thing to laugh at my jokes?'

How corporate data wizards decide it's time to re-vamp everything...

"Before we go any further, I must warn you that this is not a secure network."

"Welcome to the team, Mr Ware. What did you say your first name was?"

'We use intelligent robots, but not to intelligent because they'd want a union.'

"Step 10 paces, turn and post your opinion on facebook."

'Richard III is spamming us again.'