Cuteness Aficionado Gifts

'Boss, he followed me home. Can I mentor him?'

'I foresee a few more months of creating havoc without consequences, and then, yes, I see the 'cute' factor will start to wear thin...'

'Entering Pinestock - a case of the terminal cutes.'

'Don't worry, Finnegan... it doesn't matter how you answer the questions in a job interview. Every time they ask you something, just tilt your head sideways in that adorable way you do and they'll be putty in your hands...'

"They're so adorable at that age!"

"I know it's misspelled, but market research shows that cute sells."

'Be ready in a minute - just have to put on my face.'

'Wrinkles can't breathe in mud.'

Baby rocks!

"I don't like your application."

"That product you are using is fantastic. Your eye bags are gone."

"Really? You can make me look younger!"

"Who's a pretty girl now?"

Beauty salon - Our hair color is to dye for!

"Remember when we were Instagram models?"

'I washed the gray right out of my hair, but now I can't get the gray out of my tub.'

"We're the same age, but you look great! What's your secret?"

'There's no charge for the carrier bag!'

Rape of the Lock- The Toilet

He Sees You When You're Sleeping

Mirror, mirror on the wall, who has the best facelift of them all?

'I wasn't the smartest guy in the room, but I had the whitest teeth!'

"She's had a lot of work done."

'Hamster Swat Team.'

Martha went to desperate lengths to avoid flat hair.

'Will your wrinkle cream work on these trousers, Mavis?'

'A neighbour of mine has just come in - put 'em in a size 4 box, will you?'

'Do you want it set for light, medium or butterball?'

"I asked my hairstylist to work her magic on me and she referred me to you."

"Oh my god, you guys, a puppy!"

'Voila!! No more wrinkles!!'

'Man, I wish she would act her age.'

Brazilian Squirrels

"I have the smokey eyes look. Can the doctor still give me an eye exam?"

Cut out and keep your own Make up Artist.