Customer Service Agent Gifts

'Your call is very important to us, so please continue to hold.'

'And you've written to the council on this one.'

"Thank you for calling civil liberties - your call may be recorded."

'Washrooms are down the hall.'

4 Panel - on how aggrivating voice mail and computerized answering can be.

'Hello, you're through to customer irritation ... how may I help you?'

"When were you thinking of trying to get us to call, luv?"

'Internation services' 'European language' 'African language' 'Angry staff using terrible language'

"I can assure you sir, you're not 'talking to someone at a call centre in Pakistan'."

"He has encolosed the money as an attachment so we just have to print it out...!"

"Awwe, but just look at that face. Come on, let's let her on!"

'There's a foot in this shoe!'

"As a security precaution we'll cancel your cards, close your accounts and pretend we've never seen you."

'You have to mow it.'

"I'd like to speak with the weatherman who predicted sunny skies for today!"

"Please stay on the line....Your call is being ignored in the order in which it was received."

"It's a new bank policy, sir - Transactions under $500 just aren't worth our while."

"We will indeed be facing numerous enraged customers."

'I'm sorry, Mr. McWit, but with your infrequent flyer demerits I have to charge you double and route you through Mongolia.'

A Dog Who Never Got His Day.

'Please stay on the line -- Your call is very important to us.... important to us.... important to us.... important to us....'

"I told them they could board, but they're having a hard time letting go."

Customer Service

"I'm considering going client side. That way I can still be an a*****e and actually get away with it."

"I hope that did not come out as a growl."

"To talk to someone in Customer Service, press one, but we're pretty sure you'll want to hear our other 12 options. . ."

With Covid we will have to use booking apps it's much easier to see that you can't get a slot for a really really long time

"In appreciation for your patience, enjoy this collection of our 'on-hold' music's greatest hits!"

"There's been a 27% cut in our customer empathy budget, so you'll have to tell them to sod off."

"Now you've finished your desserts, can I interest you in some chewing gum?"

Mavis didn't realise she was still on hold. . . !

"On your marks, get set..."

'Is that an Orange?'

"Stop whinging and man up!" "Our new AI complaints management system still needs a bit of work."

"What a coincidence! I'm forwarding your request at this very moment!"