Custom Challenger Pillows

"This weekend is seriously messing with some of my previously held beliefs."

"Chocolate? I can't be allergic to chocolate! I'm a kid, can't you say I'm allergic to spinach or broccoli?"

"My email is down... talk to me."

'My imaginary playmate can whip your imaginary playmate!'

"I want to make it before I hit thirty."

Lawnmower

"Heel! Pass it on."

'Not bad. Already 17 minutes into Saturday morning before I receive my first ultimatum.'

AI

Escher flat-pack furniture

Paper being carefully folded until it resembles a scrunched up paper ball.

"You can't just put on the uniform whenever you don't want to have a conversation, Barry."

'How do you propose to repair the roof from down there?!'

'I intend to stay as CEO of this organisation come hell or high cholesterol.'

'What's with my cholesterol problem, Doc - all I eat is grass and grain!'

"Alien life-form or not, those dishes won't wash themselves up!"

'...and when I did finally take out the trash, she locked the door behind me.'

'Sorry...I don't do hugs!'

"I've got a lot of stuff, a ton of coupons, and I pay by check, so all you behind me...get comfortable!"

'Young lady, you're not going anywhere until you clean your lint trap!'

Spring cleaning.

A man walks with a dog who has learnt to scoop his own poop.

'As many items as I want or no customer!'

We don't believe one glove fits all!

10 items or less

Man and dog.

Careers Advice

"I hope this isn't another one of your crazy bounce-me-off-the-wall ideas."

"Your good cholesterol has come under the influence of your bad cholesterol."

'See a doctor. Your cholesterol is twice your weight.'

'It doesn't contain anything that'll help you find a job.'

"Tom, this is an ideas meeting, not a planning meeting."