Curvy Confidence Gifts

"Does my bum look big in this aria?"

"Right about here there was a flattening of the curve. . ."

Bad hair day!

"Honey! Where are my lucky Incredible Hulk board meeting socks?!?"

Busy man, busy life, busy shirt.

"I was young and cocky because I wasn't aware of my shortcomings. Now I'm old and cocky because I can't remember what they are."

Lemniskate

'You were right Doc: Jumping over the monn did boost my self esteem!'

Why weren't we born rich instead of beautiful?

Business coach hiding in speach desk.

Woman walking into Inner Beauty Salon.

"Can you teach me to really bark? I only seem to be able to yap..."

"I don't care what you think: it's cool, it's sexy, and I feel totally empowered."

How Gary got his groove back.

If you've got it flaunt it!

'Some people say they're ego-compensation, but what do they know.'

"I was just like you, then I hired a life coach. Now look at me!"

'I lost my shoe, but I got my foot in the door.'

PEP TALKS!

"I've had many men in this town darling, but many men have not had me."

Self esteem clinic - Go ahead, take a number. You deserve it.

'I AM going to join a gym, but I've got to get in shape first. . .'

The Return of Guarded Optimism

'I must admit, I do look good in stripes.'

'See you next week, if I'm still in the job.'

SELF-FULFILLMENT SEMINAR: 'Stop letting people walk on you'

'You can't do anything right. What you need is confidence.'

Playing dead is easy, but when they ask me to speak, I have to imagine them in their underwear.

'That explains why I have so much trouble parallel parking.'

Gertie's never been the same since she got the cape

Psychologist at Self Esteem Clinic to patient: 'You need to learn to relax more - play some miniature golf.'

Does this skirt make it look like sexy fat?

"It makes me feel better about myself."

Never Apologize for Being Yourself

"What are we doing? I think the real question is, what are you trying to hide?"