Curious Curses Gifts

'The male pattern baldness is genetic, but your dense lower back hair appears to be a gypsy curse.'

Honey Wallah

'When we all get together, we sure are vulgar.'

"What do you mean, it's not an educational toy? I'd have to learn to ride it!"

'It's nice to go hiking together. It gives us a chance to compare notes and figure out what the kids are plotting!'

'I'm glad you're getting so into science, son, but you'll have to ask your teacher about this... jjunnetics thing.'

"My goodness, no! Grandfather would never, ever let us near this!!"

'Nobody does curses like Gordon Ramsay.'

"Frankenstein? Isn't the story of a being made from the parts of others a little far-fetched?" "I find it very believable."

"Patience, you can have it back in a minute..."

'If Aunt Arctica is on the bottom of the world, does that mean Uncle Artica is on top of the world?'

Do they have to grow frozen vegetables in the winter?

Philosophers studying meta-physical chemistry.

"Yesterday's weather forecast was wrong. Is that what is meant when they say 'fake news'?"

'The Dyslexic Demonologist'

"Anything to declare aside from ever-lasting love and devotion to each other?"

"Well yes, technically penguin's are flightless birds..."

Ancient Egyptian Curser

"There's no such thing as a stupid question -- There are, however, stupid Google searches."

"Don't get too attached, everything you cherish will disappear the moment you look away. Nothing you love is permanent."

"Dad, tell me about the birds and the bees and safeguards."

'Well, that ties up the inventory of our new neighbours' possessions.'

Paranoia clinic: 'Conspiracy theories: $1.00 per dozen'.

"Goodbye Sweetheart. No matter where you go in this life, or what you do, always remember that you signed an N.D.A. with us."

"How do you like our Wednesday-night get-togethers?"

"Apparently, this curse has a lot more going for it than we figured."

'I found out in school today that 'Mom' isn't your real name! What else are you hiding from me?'

'How come corn grows this tall in only two months and I'm still just a little kid?'

'I was going to ask my parents for a baby brother but I sure won't now.'

'Mom, did I come preassembled or did you and dad have to put me together?'

"Your mother must have a hidden agenda, the way she gave you those extra cookies."

Window calls for username and swearword.

Caution Dulcimer