Curfew Captain Pillows

'If I'm not home by midnight, my wife turns on the electric fence.'

Captain in a storm

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

Leadership in the Covid-19 Era

For some reason, "The Road Less Travelled" GPS package never really caught on...

Yet another law of the jungle: 'Absolutely NO howling at the moon after 11 PM!

'Well, it wasn't my lucky day... first there was that shark and then I bimped into a bunch of beaver!'

"Sorry, Rick, but no thongs means no thongs."

'If we get out of this alive, I'm going to have a darn good look at your resume.'

Welsh airport arrivals.

Captain looks out of a porthole and notices that the ship is sinking.

'Trust me, you're not going to need an alarm clock.'

'I like to greet the new team members myself.'

'You have her home by midnight, now!'

"The Captain really, really hates losing at shuffleboard."

"This crew gets 15 miles to the pound of gruel. They're very fuel efficient."

It became increasingly difficult for the captain to reward his crew and still maintain his ferocious reputation.

"How can you feel queasy, we're barely out of port."

Captain Ahab (Ret.)

Verbal Orders

'Captain, there's someone pissing in the hold!'

"A storm rages from the East - tell the men to get below and snuggle up for movie night."

What really happened on the EVER GIVEN

Solemn Reference is Made to Mr Bunsby

"Get those decks cleaned you swabs!..."

The crew can no longer tolerate Captain Bligh's ruthless splitting of infinitives."

'That seating section is for video gamers only.'

"This is their way of reminding us how we're losing our best hope for Olympic Gold."

'I told you we should have unionized.'

"Wait...Did I Say 'North'?"

'So it's true that dolphins help navigate.'

'Well, we still think you're a naughty boy, running away to sea like that!'

"Sorry, Captain, but we have to let you go. You just lack leader-ship skills."