Cup Of Humor Pillows

"I heard we're now legal in some states."

"Of course it's alien abductions! How else would you explain the, 'November Phenomenon'?"

My other car has a bumper sticker that says this on it too.

"I love a woman with a sense of humour."

"Of course I've been drinking!"

'You've had enough!'

"I'm not normally a big fan of slapstick comedy, but seeing ol' Hotchkiss there..."

Menopause and the City

"I've been a chef for far too long...."

"You're getting more wrinklier, grandpa. You should drink more water."

Pope Kimba XXIII.

"The test results have come back - you ARE a t**t."

'What colour is a hiccup?'

"I'm told the omelettes here have a broader purpose."

"It requires so much less work than a dog."

'Stocks rose on news engineers are close to developing a car that runs on lattes!'

'Hello, is that Dugdame and Son's, the plumber?'

"Whoops - the server's gone down again!"

'Looks like another typical caffeine overdose.'

"The asteroid will hit in 2032, but I’m prepared!"

'Yes, I laugh at most things, but it doesn't mean I can't have a serious conversation...'

"Well, team....time to trade our 'You Got This!' coffee mugs to the 'Mistakes Were Made' mugs."

Remember you predicted some 'difficulties' with my bank?

'You really should believe in yourself.'

To make your computer faster, please pour two cups of Espresso into your CD drive.

'What do you think about renewable energy?'

Do not allow your owner to foul the footpath.

Tea Cup Ride

"I asked you to take Mother home, not too a home."

Heirlooms of Tomorrow

"Dude, don't say it..."

'Is $8.5 million really worth all this?'

'... And the last thing I remember saying was, 'It oughta be a sin to look this good.''

'He's been at it too long. Now, when he bell rings, Dr. Pavlov salivates.'

Ed's Pizza and the Cardiology Clinic.