Culinary Tv Devotee Gifts

"I'm afraid we only watch the cookery programmes."

'Does this thing get channel four.'

TV chef sets the TV on fire.

"I'd hold off on the peking duck another five minutes...the show's almost over."

'By the time I'd watched Delia and Ainsley and Jamie Oliver and Floyd...I'd spoiled the broth.'

Mary Berry

"When did they add this channel?!"

'You're so sophisticated and witty...and muscular...do you work out? Why, yes, I'd love to come back to your place.'

"I should have never let you watch those cooking shows on TV!"

"The recipe says, that the whipped cream has to be piped onto the sponge."

Hand coming out of chandelier pulls cover off waiter's food.

Those who bought my cookbook with the transposed pages will get a refund. Those who actually enjoy Lobster Alfredo a la mode - bon app

"Curl your fingers to avoid cuts when slicing or chopping...I learned that trick on a TV cooking show!"

'It's indigestion due to your lifestyle, you're watching too many T.V. cookery shows.'

"He's been watching all those cookery programmes."

Do we have to watch Gordon Ramsey flambeing swordfish steaks in red wine while we eat our frozen fish cakes and instant mash?

'What TV dinner goes best with a sitcom?'

'I'll never be able to cook like TV chefs, goodbye.'

"Dear God, noooooo oooo!" "The Oreo tragedy"

"I knew it."

A Packers' Fan During The Offseason.

TV dinner

"Canned food, canned music, canned laughs. Yes we can."

How to watch television wo getting spaghetti sauce, , ,

Catch of the Day is the chef's wife's boyfriend.

'What began as a perfectly normal TV evening changed abruptly when Jamie Oliver suddenly began desecrating the Saladifist religious community's holiest relic... '

Cannibal cookery programme.

"Jamie Oliver, Gordon Ramsey, Master Chef, The Hairy Bikers and Bake Off - that's your five a day - now get to bed!"

"Irene's mother warned her about marrying split pea soup."

'Be a dear and nip to the chippy will you, love?'

Sign reading: Barrell Scraper - Ideal for finding new TV cookery show ideas

"I got a dish, but it only picks up the Food Channel."

'It's the only way I can get him to eat.'

'She discovered Gordon Ramsay.'

"It's just toast, I'm afraid..."