Culinary Escape T-Shirts

'What have I made for dinner? A reservation at the restaurant down the road. . .'

'I couldn't stand the heat, so I got out of the kitchen.'

'Chocolate milk, carrot cake,candied yams...see, there's a solution to everything!'

Kung food restaurant (Waiter flies through the air bringing the food).

Careful, the plate's probably still hot.

"O young, naive one...you must know the golden rule of the kitchen. To avoid the mother of all disrespects...never criticize the cooking of a family elder."

"Chomp... Chomp... Curry Tree..."

"And then, when I feel like a rum punch and breaded shrimp, I can just swim to Tony’s Trattoria."

When the ship needed to go faster than Warp Speed, the crew ate lots of pungent beans.

"Dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, onion bagel with Nutella and cream cheese, dirt, dirt, dirt..."

"I envy you, but my dietary requirements make it difficult for me to travel..."

"Fresh pepper?"

"Are these prices?" "No, that's our Calorie-fixe menu."

"You have a big check because you had a big wine."

Man's cooking explodes.

Culinary Breakthroughs During Social Distancing

The Velvet Mesquite

All-Day Breakfast

'And thanks be to the lord that we're going out to eat on Friday...'

"The food here is excellent- what time is breakfast?"

Acme Foods. Research and Development. Then it's an "no" on the Mexican Jumping Bean Dip?

"The Halloween Special is the pork and kraut. It'll come back and haunt you."

Government survey into the effects of haggis throwing in Ethiopia.

Fish flipping flapjack in pan. Title: 'Ed was glad he'd caught a panfish.'

'Waiter, I think my wife's calamari is underdone.'

Chef De Party.

'Gary freaked out a bit and went way off the griddle.'

'Stop him, he's got the receipe.' Duck running away

"Can you recommend a nice red wine that goes well with a broken heart?"

'I have a bad feeling about this place, Watson... and I smell a rat!'

Sushi Train Spotters

'All our family's creativity is channelled into finding ways to gain weight.

Never use a cookbook written by a mystery book author. You never know how things will turn out!

'All the kings horses and all the king's men? No, I'm calling my cousin Louie, he owns a restaurant!'

"I'm sorry, your grapefruit subscription ran out and I forgot to renew it."