Culinary Equestrian Pillows

Wendy likes horses...and she is a keen cook.

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

Soup of the month.

'My diet's good...I'm two weeks ahead of schedule.'

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

'Er . . . and a fork for me...'

'I started out washing dishes, but when the dishwater tasted better than the soup...'

Garden.

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

Man with 'Real Ale' written on t-shirt, woman with 'Real Pine' written on rolling pin

"Waiter, can you heat this up? The wild salmon got cold while I was posting it to Instagram."

Too much cilantro

Health and Safety Gone Mad.

Elfian lady grilling on mushroom: 'Summertime in the Enchanted Forest'.

"It's smells so good, but why do you have to wait so long?!"

"Ooooooh, just what I wanted!"

Before getting a basketball scholarship, Jack worked at a pancake house.

"It was wonderful, Henri. Arnold had died and gone to heaven."

I love Cannelloni

"Hmm...I LOVE chocolate chip ice cream...!"

Baker Romance

'You're lucky there, Sir. That's the last one in the world.'

'Don't let him pick the wine. He thinks Dom Perignon was someone who got knocked off on the Sopranos.'

Holiday Supplies

The Classy Dog: 'Dine & dance hotdogs: '50 cents a dance'.

'I was in the catering corps.'

'Do you want me to get the fish bone out, or not?'

Restaurant Chef with book titled: 'Introduction To Cooking'.

Feast

Victorian Fast Food - 'I'll have the lark pie festooned with eels, a full stilton, two bottles of port,,,'

The Perfect Foil

Fly Tastings: 'Notice that hint of dog fur and then let that full bodied garbage finish unfold.'

"Please don't kill me."

"What's happened to Quiche?"

This is Dr. Sadie, what's your question, caller? I just found out my wife got a bonus at work. But instead of buying gifts for my mother and my six brothers, she flew to Maui and sent me a photo of herself eating a seven-course meal. Stop whining. She's given you the best gift a spouse can give ... Something to hold over her head for the rest of your lives. Well ... There is that, I guess.