Culinary Disaster Fans Pillows

'Something in the fridge has gone off.'

'It's good to see that you have a smoke detector...'

"Do you want ketchup on your steak too?"

The world's worst restaurant. Now under new bad management.

"Dad's dinner really is melt-in-your-mouth...it's half frozen!"

'Oh, hi!... yes, we have another emergency... make it the usual, and you know the address!'

"The scallops were delicious, but the fork was dismal!"

'Believe it or not you're our greatest liability Jones!'

"My dad ate my homework."

"Of course it tastes like chicken. That's why it's called the 'tuna surprise'."

'The molto randy refelled her genoise.'

"Are you still waiting for the pancake to come down?"

"The fire department ruined dinner."

Killer Apple Pie Threatens Earth.

'Andy STILL hasn't got the hang of spaghetti..'

"Well it's either my dinner or my shirt."

'Please stand by. We have temporary loss of your roast.'

'Well, lucky you! The chef informs me that his breakfast special today is blackened scrambled eggs!'

'Should my souffle blow the oven door off?'

"The chef's having a tough day, what with coroners and such."

'How was the snapper, sir?'

'Do you mind if I smoke?'

'What do you mean, send out for pizza? This is pizza!'

"And you say this was the serving suggestion?"

Smelly fish.

'Jeeves, you've made this soup taste like absolute s**t! Well done!'

'You must be the only wife who uses a smoke alarm as a food timer!'

"I'm sorry, the sesame peanut dressing is not agreeing with him."

"Okay, let's eat."

"How is everything?"

"Gesundheit!"

'No, we can't pass it off as 'blackened' goulash!'

'Let's sit in front of the fire.'