Culinary Critique Artist T-Shirts

"The taste was fine, but the presentation only got me 5 likes."

Tartine

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

A woman standing beside a stove full of steaming pots and pans.

"Just bring me something that's going to look good on social media."

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

Every barbecue has its winners and losers.

'Progress of a bookshelf'

Ice Cream Surgeon

The wonderful world of cheese.

"The chef is going to need more than just your ‘compliments’ tonight … he’s in one of his moods."

Too Many Lawyers Spoil the Broth

"Yo, Cézanne, paint faster. I need those grapes for the Madeira sauce."

"Waiter! Two of your finest menus!"

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

"You said the cauliflower is locally grown – would you elaborate?"

Pi Ala Mode.

Children's Feast.

"I'm afraid the challah got a little burnt this week."

'I'll have you know sir, that we used the finest columbian coffee beans in that dishwater.'

'He made an excellent jelly.'

View to the Future

Wok. Don't Wok.

'I'm going to make a batch of my ginger biscuits.'

'But Mom, I like potatoes in their jackets.'

'Eight years old, huh? If it's so good, why didn't somebody drink it eight years ago?'

"I feel like we are the polyester of dairy products."

"Compliments to the chef! Pass it on."

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

His New Grillfriend

"Mommy's going to teach you how to make a hamburger."

'Which wine list would you like, Sir - Classics or Plonk?'

'You realize we're only having three people over...'

"Which wine would you pair with the complimentary bread and butter?"