Culinary Antics Mugs

'Keep complaining about my meals and you can fry your own salad!'

Too Many Lawyers Spoil the Broth

"Chomp... Chomp... Curry Tree..."

"Do you want to be vaguely dissatisfied with Italian or Korean?"

"I envy you, but my dietary requirements make it difficult for me to travel..."

"And then, when I feel like a rum punch and breaded shrimp, I can just swim to Tony’s Trattoria."

When the ship needed to go faster than Warp Speed, the crew ate lots of pungent beans.

"Dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, onion bagel with Nutella and cream cheese, dirt, dirt, dirt..."

"Are these prices?" "No, that's our Calorie-fixe menu."

"That’s a toaster. It’s a tanning bed for bread."

'How is the water prepared?'

Chef copy robot

All-Day Breakfast

'It's labour-saving because with this you'll be able to burn my meals much faster!'

"The Halloween Special is the pork and kraut. It'll come back and haunt you."

"Carpe pizza"

Chef De Party.

'Ok. I'm cooking dinner. What sounds good?'

'I have a bad feeling about this place, Watson... and I smell a rat!'

'YAY! PATE!'

'Gary freaked out a bit and went way off the griddle.'

"We need a new stove. This one's beginning to burn oil."

A short-order cook gets sucked into the exhaust vent over the grill.

'I hope it's okay -- the cookbook had some really confusing abbreviations.'

'Todays special - egg on Ronay'

'Are you sure the recipe calls for a whole cup of good burgundy?'

'Snob, he won't eat domestic slugs, just imports.'

"Be right with you - just need to call for a tow truck and change today's 'Catch of the Day' to venison."

The Family Joules: Part 14

'Sorry, but we're going out for dinner.'

Damaged goods & lawyer's torts 50 off.

I won! I finished my pizza first! Want to make it two out of three?

'It's the same as our regular Angels hair pasta, but with extra grease.'

"Rare, medium or well done?"

"Gimme a double burger between two burgers. And hold the lettuce; it only dilutes the experience."