Cuisine Aficionado T-Shirts

" 'Chicken Vindaloo for the Hindu Soul' is but the tip of the iceberg in our initial strategy of global expansion."

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

La Table

'Of course you're very dear to me - that meal just cost a fortune.'

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

'My diet's good...I'm two weeks ahead of schedule.'

'Er . . . and a fork for me...'

'We don't 'skimp' on the pour, sir; we're just generous with the glass.'

"Vindaloo hot enough?"

Omar Khayyam Meets Trader Joe

"I come here for the pepper."

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

"Which wine would you pair with the complimentary bread and butter?"

"Keep your glasses on. It will look like twice as much."

"Hmmm ... you're right — I forgot the brie."

Man with 'Real Ale' written on t-shirt, woman with 'Real Pine' written on rolling pin

'I'm sure M'lady will appreciate the mashed potatoes. Our chef uses only grass-fed single-udder butter.'

Health and Safety Gone Mad.

Elfian lady grilling on mushroom: 'Summertime in the Enchanted Forest'.

"And I'll have that lightly sedated, please."

"Is the asparagus farm-raised or wild-caught?"

'Why, thank you. When they started the vineyard five generations ago, I heard they were shooting for freakin' awesome.'

"It was wonderful, Henri. Arnold had died and gone to heaven."

"Have you decided on what you'd like to have?"

Baker Romance

Full English Breakfast.

"Ooooooh, just what I wanted!"

"It's smells so good, but why do you have to wait so long?!"

'You're lucky there, Sir. That's the last one in the world.'

'Pigs feet, sir?' 'Are they pickled?'

'I was in the catering corps.'