Cue Club Champ Gifts

"You don't need English on every shot."

'I've tried all night without potting a ball.' - 'Try taking away the wooden frame.'

'Mr. Coleman is on vacation. Would you care to hold?'

'I like you, you've got balls.'

Shouting Fire in a Crowded Theater

'Not that slowly back...'

Dog playing snooker/pool.

Cleaner playing pool with brush.

Weapons supplies to Ukraine. . . Weapons supplies to Russia.

The nonprofit dog fight.

Brownie Points

Snooker.

"Show some appreciation when he comes home: he spends his days in a small cubicle staring at numbers on the screen. He puts up with a lot in order to feed us."

'All his life, Mel has been convinced that he's a poster boy for something... he's just never been able to figure out what, exactly.'

Nato

I'm no longer welcome at the county fair.

'He's even better when he takes the cue out of it's case.'

'He's lost a lot of eight-ball.'

Man wearing 'Save the whale, rainforst,legalise pot..' t shirt "I think you need to be more focussed."

Play golf on the billiards table.

"When I finally got my own car, I never drove over the speed limit."

"What setting do I use for this?"

"We rescued him form the research lab."

Two men attempt to use the same snooker cue.

"Save ALL animals, you bastard!"

Animal Shelter. Adoptions. We love you already! Who is rescuing whom is a fair question here.

'How would you have played that last ball?'

'I know, I know. You're stripes. I get it, already.'

'Ease up a bit on the cue ball.'

"On the sixteenth hole? I can sympathize with you, but I can't let you go back and finish the round!"

'Oh what's the use? You don't know the course.'

"Your issue should be simple to resolve. I'll just go and get someone less qualified to help you."

"I glued myself to a snooker ball."

"'Wash the Car'? Isn't that nepotism?"

"What about selling drugs to the rich and keeping the money for ourselves?"