Crutch Master T-Shirts

Schoolboy with broken leg.

"Tommy!"

Guitar Man.

"Mulch madness"

'I can't get out! -- I lost the owner's manual!'

The lame cowboy with spurs on his crutches.

"You scratch my back, I'll scratch your is just a figure of speech, Ned. A little left, and higher."

'Summer's over and it's time to fall in!'

'He's a retired Drill-Sergeant!'

Important Muscles.

"Your painting is both original and good. Sadly, the good bits are not original and the original bits are not good."

"Just badly sprained thank goodness... I was so scared it might be broken..."

'Bob likes to express himself through his art!'

'To find out how to start your new mobile, please read the manual. T' read the manual, please start your mobile.

"The instructions state that some anger, frustration and confusion is expected."

"Have you tried turning it off and on again?"

'Yesterday you pulled 8 muscles when you sneezed. I think it's time you started exercising again.'

"Careful, underneath that layer of snow there's a layer of confusion."

'Laughter is the best medicine, so read this joke book three times a day after meals.'

"Top quality line, expert knot, expensive lure: Now, that's how you recognise a Sport Fisherman..."

"Hey dude, when I said 'curls might help', that's not what I meant."

"Do you want my opinion as an art critic or as your best friend?"

'Unfortunately, he's very productive in paintings, not money.'

"Shhh, Daddy's painting – snack time can wait."

Working Out

Gardener's Calendar: January - Look for some out-of-the-way corner and start your compost heap.

'Good. Now slide the 'O' ring over the hubble's sleeve there in front of you.'

"I hope I can still move like that when I'm her age."

Anabolic Steroids

"Well, I've noticed someone always finds time for the 'odd jobs' around here he wants to do!"

'I think we better get started on that other arm.'

'The new physio's red hot on pre-match stretching.'