Crunchy Granola T-Shirts

"Sometimes I fear that wheat germ has been lost in the health-food shuffle."

Why Do Old Hippies Smile?

Ginger's bakery: Our Cookies Snap!

"It's this trend that leads us to believe we should supplement our oil commodities with investments in some of the Earth's rich vinegar and crouton reserves."

But I followed the recipe exactly.

"Say Gorgon-zola!"

"She's passed out...quick! take her pulses!"

"And there it is... Coronation chicken"

'Police. We have reason to believe you've been hacking into your neighbor's computers and stealing their recipes.'

Hitching a lift

"This sub tastes much better with some traffic jam."

Oh, Boy, Mom. A peanut and jellyworm sandwich.'

Pork bellies 3 times a day...cookbook for the commodities investor.

'Gentlemen, tonight's special is broiled sea urchin, with raspberries, over candy corn, with a goat's milk sauce. I would suggest a wine to recommend with it, had I attended sommelier school in the Twilight Zone.'

"I'm sorry you've got a sudden craving for nachos, Mrs. Hacksburry, but I really don't want to open the store right now!"

'If we eat all the snowflakes, Dad won't have to shovel the driveway.'

"Jim! Long time. Are you still making your own granola?"

Kid to Mom: 'Do you know what would be even better than these cookies? More cookies.'

"The shell tastes good, but that gooey stuff inside is terrible."

The individual cheese slice. Oddly, not the first choice for the truly individual.

"How come you never get the kind of granola with the chocolate chips in it?"

Woman watering her plants in the rain.

'She's a vegetarian.'

Chip Magnet

Hunting safety rule #1...Don't go hunting with Larry.

Served All Day!

Carcass in a cup (street vendor cart)

How different foods crunch.

'Don't worry- mine is the good E. Coli.'

'-and may I have a prawn cocktail - with a cherry in it?'

'I try to supply the best of both worlds.'

"It's a nutritious synthetic protein that will be a sensation if we can sell it as a worthless snack."

"I don't really consider oatmeal raisin cookies real cookies. They're more like little granola frisbees."