Cruelty-free Lifestyle Gifts

Investments: Yes, we have organic, local & cruelty-free stocks.

"Even the waiters here are organic."

"Steamed vegetables."

"They say we destroy plants – such as potatoes, corn and carrots – and they're boycotting us. They're fruitarians."

"1. Flimsig used pallets, old foam 2. Stinkum goat wool 3. Beetup recycled lumber 4. Riskig kerosene lamp 5. Stupor hand blown by Nils 6. Smokum found on beach in Mendocino 7. Woblig 100% driftwood"

"They've got me doing cosmetics research."

'Can't stand diary products myself, but a job's a job.'

Save our Planet.

Whatever!

"If you think this is bad, you should see what they do to themselves"

They don't test products on lab animals at Earthstone Cosmetics.

Rabbit pulled from top hat carries 'Stop animal cruelty' banner

"Hail to thee, blithe spirit!"

'It is Hyena. You said you wanted a fun fur.'

"They grow up so slow."

Animal cosmetic testing

"There are no animal products in our dishes, but since the meals are prepared by animals, you may find some stray hairs."

At One With Nature

"I was the first one to work completely gluten free."

"It might taste a little different. It's gluten-free slop."

"We seem to be the only animals here."

Deforestation

"What've you got that's good for vegans?"

"Here you are - Two house martinis, humanely poured!"

"Today a protest at the White House..."

"I could use some of those animal rights activists about now."

"Our view is if it isn't made in a factory, it's organic."

"The most moral consumer - Didn't shop at Walmart - Didn't order things on Amazon unless it was, like, an emergency - Tried to be vegan - Always had an extra canvas bag in her car (which was a hybrid, by the way)"

"You can be the mom. I want to be the family friend who has plants instead of babies.'

Product Testing: Nicotine and Cosmetics.

'I jogged 120 miles last month and drank 3 gallons of wine. At 40 mpg, I'm doing more than my share for the energy crisis.'

"This was supposed to be 'Gluten-Free Comedy Night.' Which means no wheat jokes."

"Do you mind?"

A group of angry fur-less Minks have finally found the person who has their former furs being used for a coat.

"The gluten is free. The pizza, however, cost $12.95."