Crowded Space Survivor Gifts

Abandon Personal Space All Ye Who Enter Here

"Tight......this isn't tight...now a New York City apartment......that's tight."

"You've got those Stuck-in-the-Subway-Listening-to-a-Guy-Massacre-Dylan Blues."

"Bad morning. I was running late and skipped my coffee, diet soda, energy drink and Ritalin."

Leaving a Real Impression: That's one small step for (a) man, one giant leap for mankind.

"Wanna play 'Waitin’ on the Cable Guy'?"

"Please fill out these forms. We don't need them for anything, but you're making me nervous staring at your watch."

'Look at the bright side. Think of our mutual funds going up, up, up!'

"Actually, I didn't become dizzy and nauseous until I started inhaling the scent strips in the waiting room magazines."

'I'm looking for a romantic tale of wild, unbridled passion I can read while being pushed and groped on the subway.'

"The thing with tiny kitchens is it's all about stacking, patience and resenting all your previous life choices."

'I sure hope you're a marriage counselor.'

The Bus Stop.

"No, we're no gods, we're God's gift to women!"

'Well, good morning Mr. Daniel, have a seat in our waiting room.'

'The tide goes out along way, doesn't it?'

'Election years are the best time to land -- they never notice us in all the turmoil.'

A holiday maker greets a castaway

'I said, now I know why they call you 'Lucky'!'

'I have another doctor, but I like your magazines better.'

Adam and Eve tempted by apple in hazmat suits.

'You're trying to hail a taxi?... Are you insane? You'll never get one at this time of day!'

"I'm pretty sure the term is 'interface,' not 'in your face.'"

"Why anyone should look forward to a subway series is beyond me."

'Mission control? We'd like to take an unscheduled spacewalk.'

'We'll see you again in three months time, then, sir.'

'LAND!'

"I'd say my number-one issue is getting off the island, and then, after that, probably health care."

Sitting Room, Standing Room Only.

"I'm sorry, but I believe I'm now way out of your network."

"I'm raising four kids, a husband, three pets and I work. This is nothing."

Subway rider holds onto man's tie.

"I'm looking for something that will keep people away from me on the subway."

"We've really had it this time."

'Easy. In space there's no gravity, so her wrinkles are gone. Plus her mother-in-law can't phone her and he kids won't nag her!'