Critical Tv Viewer Pillows

'I've seen nothing I've liked since Victor Meldrew!'

"And just like that, e got rid of Florida."

'In its new 'spirit of evenhandedness,' the U. S. Government today sent troops to occupy all foreign countries....'

"We just watched a hypermovie!"

"Let's go watch TV I hear there are bowl games on."

Tree house.

This is a great game --- All except for that blimp. It keeps reminding me I've already broken my diet resolution. Pizza. Chips.

"For most people, the sense of panic will be mild."

'Och lye the news'

"I know he's funny, boy, but he’s also the president of the United States."

The Three Kinds of People

Please stand by. As stocks soar, our announcer is having a fit of the giggles.

'Your mom is probably watching. Go for the jugular.'

"Would you mind adjusting the vibrate on your phone? There's a seismologist on TV claiming there's been an earthquake in our neighborhood."

"Scientists confirmed today that everything we know about the structure of the universe is wrongedy-wrong-wrong."

Do you go for Hannity or O'Reilly? Tough call. O'Reilly's presence is so big, fearless. Whereas Hannity has a wicked fast tongue and such inner strength. As symbolized externally by his jawline. O'Reilly is so tall. Something strange is happening. Coulter's a bit masculine for my tastes. Ditto. HOJ.

'Harry! - If you can hear me - what did you do with the remote!?'

"Or we could turn on the TV and let younger, more beautiful people have sex for us."

Incorrect weather forecasts.

"Then we agree. 10 minutes of your news, then 10 minutes of mine."

It's a Dog's life

'The opinions expressed by Burt are not necessarily those of Ernie.'

'According to the latest reports, there were no earlier reports.'

"So much for finding intelligent life on this planet."

"Well, Mom, I guess you saw what happened."

"I'm the bluebird of PMS. Fetch me some decaf and turn on the air conditioner. I'm burning up in here!"

'...According to the survey, Canadians prefer the doggie style positions, so the can both keep watching the Hockey game...'

"Sooner or later you just knew it had to come to this. . ."

"Today, in all aspects of life losses outnumbered gains."

Sherlock Holmes' tax return

'The sword in the stone was just a warm-up - now you must remove this remote control ...'

'I got my degree by watching JEOPARDY.'

Dog watched 'Fire Hydrants of the Rich and Famous.'

Man ignores a football kicked through the window because his attention is on the TV.

'I hate these commerical breaks!'