Critical Tv Viewer Pillows

'I've seen nothing I've liked since Victor Meldrew!'

"And just like that, e got rid of Florida."

'In its new 'spirit of evenhandedness,' the U. S. Government today sent troops to occupy all foreign countries....'

"Let's go watch TV I hear there are bowl games on."

Tree house.

"For most people, the sense of panic will be mild."

'Och lye the news'

"I know he's funny, boy, but he’s also the president of the United States."

The Three Kinds of People

'Your mom is probably watching. Go for the jugular.'

Please stand by. As stocks soar, our announcer is having a fit of the giggles.

"Would you mind adjusting the vibrate on your phone? There's a seismologist on TV claiming there's been an earthquake in our neighborhood."

"Scientists confirmed today that everything we know about the structure of the universe is wrongedy-wrong-wrong."

Incorrect weather forecasts.

"Or we could turn on the TV and let younger, more beautiful people have sex for us."

'Harry! - If you can hear me - what did you do with the remote!?'

It's a Dog's life

"Then we agree. 10 minutes of your news, then 10 minutes of mine."

"I'm the bluebird of PMS. Fetch me some decaf and turn on the air conditioner. I'm burning up in here!"

'According to the latest reports, there were no earlier reports.'

"Well, Mom, I guess you saw what happened."

"So much for finding intelligent life on this planet."

"Today, in all aspects of life losses outnumbered gains."

"Sooner or later you just knew it had to come to this. . ."

'The opinions expressed by Burt are not necessarily those of Ernie.'

'...According to the survey, Canadians prefer the doggie style positions, so the can both keep watching the Hockey game...'

'The sword in the stone was just a warm-up - now you must remove this remote control ...'

"Dad, I was thinking...can I get a tattoo...right here!"

'I hate these commerical breaks!'

It's 10PM. Do you know if you're under electronic surveillance from a spy satellite?