Crime Thriller Aficionado Pillows

"Do you mind telling me where you're going with this?"

"You got to hand it to Bloody Eddy—it's the last place in the world you'd think of as a hide-out."

Death by Television

'Hell's freezing over. The only thing I can figure is that a house was left unlocked in New York City for a week, and nothing was stolen.'

"Yes, the doctor who put the cast on your legs used to be a mafia killer and is now in witness protection. . . how do you know that??"

"It's all about the freezer storage space for Vinny."

"Now, were those friends of your Gettys or Gottis?"

We're here at House of Java cafe at an all-too-familiar scene. House of Java.net Cybercafe. Tommy Jones, a local boy, has been caught stealing a scone. A minor offense? Not to the cafe's proprietor. He's demanding the boy be sentenced as an adult. But I'm eight! Wahhh! Add a year to the sentence for whining and crying.

"What do you recommend for someone being tried in absentia?"

Round up all the king's horses and all the king's men for questioning.

"But he had a mask and I thought he was a burglar."

"Stop summoning me about rising sea levels. I do costumed supervillains staling jewels, men in beanies grabbing handbags - that sort of thing."

"That's her - that's the girl who broke into our house! But her hair was 'goldier'."

Cat Burglar

"'A body at rest'? -- Are you writing murder mysteries now, Isaac?"

'Ah Mr Bond, I haven't been expecting you...'

'You shouldn't knock them back so quickly.'

Money laundering - shows money flowing out of US vault.

Bernard Madhoff $50-billion Ponzi financial scheme.

'Breaking Bad' Box Set Addiction.

"So, just to be clear: the 'voices inside your head' told you to launder the money from forfeited law enforcement seizures in exchange for federal tax breaks for your Uncle Mark in Costa Rica?"

"Since he's been a plagiarist, committed perjury and runs a Ponzi scheme, trust can be an issue."

Whodunnit. Whoreallydunnit.

"I felt I could make more of a difference within the system."

The Big Book of Suspicious Crawl Spaces

'Your honor, I'd like a short recess so my client can make a run for it.'

'They're very proud of me. I'm the first in my family to be convicted of a white-collar crime.'

'This could be me and you, your honor. Heading for Las Vegas!'

"I'm not leading the witness; I'm winding up my segment on heinous crimes!"

"You're not grandma at all! In fact, I think this is a case of identity theft!"

'Any ideas on motive?' 'Only one, Chief.'

The evidence destroyed

"Don't make me send in the bad cat."

Mobsters at the Beach

'During the break, my client stole my wallet.'