Crime Show Watcher Pillows

'Sir, the stupidity of your actions was directly proportional to the number of surveillance cameras watching you.'

'I'm afraid we've got a cereal killer on our hands!'

'Identity theft, eh? -- Just who do you think you are?'

"...We know it was one of these bastards that done it.'

"Don't pull that ditzy-chick, routine with me! A witness saw you cross the road, what I want to know is. . . why?"

'No doubt about it Captain. See these markings? This arrow belongs to Robin Hood!'

"This is probably not the time to admit I only joined the force because I figured we'd just be chasing cat burglars."

Good Cop/Bad Cholesterol

"You can't prove that I broke it! Where's your physical evidence? Fingerprints or a DNA profile?"

Joan Hickson

"Now that's a win."

"Don't make me warn you again, monkey. Stay outa the curiosity racket."

'We subpoenaed all of 'Mr. Big's' electronic messages. They're in morse code.'

"At some point, there's only so high you can raise the volume before you admit you're never gonna understand what British detectives are saying."

"#notguilty."

'When I grow up I want to join the SWAT team!'

'I hate frisking magicians!'

Before the riots/after the riots

"I think I'm as patient as the next person, but my husband wouldn't stop saying 'yo,' so I shot him."

"Okay so which one stole your cereal?"

'Hey, buddy -- can you keep a secret?'

'Careful, Mugsy, he's got a tool.'

"Take your time. Do you see the person who made you wear that dress?"

Miami Mice

'I got 397 dead birds and the mayor breathing down my neck. So, is this our perp or just another copycat?'

"All I can figure is that he must have been inspecting the water quality of our lakes and rivers when he became entangled in cement."

"WIFI, Amazon, credit cards. Pretty much every password is named after me."

'And for those of you calling in to say he is behind us - OH NO he isn't.'

'It's heartbreaking to see Reynolds in trouble for fraud again, but I always look forward to his rooftop chases.'

"I can't be sure...I only got a quick look."

Cat points to the dog who injured him, at a police station.

'There's my place. Technically it's still a crime scene, but you're more than welcome to traipse through it.'

"I'm sorry- when you said 'bad' cop, I assumed you meant incompetent."

"Stick to the specials and no one gets hurt."