Crime Scene Analyst Pillows

"The DNA sample from the mink fibres found in the suspect's car matched the DNA sample from the mink coat found at the scene of the crime, so I'm thinking, maybe these minks were twins?"

'Never mind WHOdunit - HOWdunnit?'

'The killer should not be hard to find - he has left a trail of inserts.'

"So despite the strong smell of petrol you still claim that your husband, cat and budgie all spontaneously combusted?"

"They grow up so fast."

CSI: Mother Goose Unit...'Hmmm...I'm beginning to suspect that perhaps mister Dumpty's demise wasn't simply a tragic accident.'

Sherlock Holmes selling Sherlock Holmes.

'No doubt about it Captain. See these markings? This arrow belongs to Robin Hood!'

"Talk, Wallace - where'd you hide the loot?"

"You can't prove that I broke it! Where's your physical evidence? Fingerprints or a DNA profile?"

'Mark my word, Walters, this is no ordinary virus.'

Fred Dinsdale - Forensic expert.

"We need rain."

"True crime meets reality TV"

'It was part way through the initial investigation that detective Walters felt as if he was being watched, but there was no one in the room. No one that is except the cat, who sat contently on the chair and watched him with an almost human repose.'

Next camera crew 5 mins

'Any ideas on motive?' 'Only one, Chief.'

Big finger print trying to forge a cheque but he can't.

Police outline artist training academy: the intro 101 class.

'By the looks of these skid marks, Humpty didn't fall- he was pushed!'

Police man stands guard at a murder scene in Egyptology department of a museum.

Cop Shop: Bulk, dried blood, shaved hair, ground teeth, assorted body parts and bone fragments.

Bribery and Corruption.

Newton's Law and Order.

'Looks like the victim was trying to tell us something,'

"All the salmon has disappeared yet every door to the house was locked. Oh, it's a mystery all right."

"... and I would have gotten away with it if it weren’t for you meddling forensic pathologists."

"According to stomach content analysis he'll be dead in half an hour."

"I couldn't finish that book either."

Turkey Autopsy

CSI: Alaska. "What have we got, Ted?" "Looks like a snowball with a rock in it...I'll know more when I get it back to the lab."

'We suspect death by Sunday supplement.'

'We've got a new DNA database...'

Well, you're busted! Forensics just came back: the bite-marks match your dental records!

"Has anyone considered that maybe his dress was a disguise?"