Crime Prevention Buff Pillows

"We're from Neighborhood Watch. We'd like to see some I.D."

"Did you remember to lock the back door? You know we've got one of the highest burglary rates in the country?"

Nelson Mandela in despair over the crime rates in SA.

hard-boiled egg...

'You know too much,'

'What's wrong with our new shed? Nothing - I'm sat out here guarding it.'

'What's wrong with those Europeans? We have more murders in this city than England, France Germany and Spain combined.'

Mayhem, Inc. Part 29

"The numbers don't lie . . . but we do."

"That's not a knife crime initiative. That's a knife crime initiative!"

"Don't you think you're taking this whole, 'neighbourhood watch' thing a little too serious, dear?"

Violent Crime Statistics

"I worked hard, I played hard and I embezzled hard."

'I'm afraid we're going to have to let you go, Richter. The crime rate has dropped.'

'If you'll excuse me, my car is on fire.'

"Wear a wire? Oh, no, all of our police informants have gone wireless."

'We want more police on our streets!' 'WHAT?! Do you have any idea how dangerous it is out there?'

'By the looks of these skid marks, Humpty didn't fall- he was pushed!'

"When I grow up I'm going to be a police officer and follow in my dad's footsteps."

"Brutus! Attack with reasonable force!"

"I told you we should have had separate trials."

"You can lie to the prosecutor but don't ever lie to your co-conspirators."

'Oh no! They've been pinched.'

'Your father installed a security system.'

With his mothers persuasion, Joe decided to 'come clean' to the police!

"Looks like he's been salted, Sarge.2

"We can't put you in a Witness-Protection Program unless you actually witnessed something."

Restorative Justice Victim's Revenge.

The Ferguson Effect

Police Dept. K-9 Unit. Just once I'd like to go undercover as a bad dog.

Retrospection.

A giant hand identifies giant legs in a police line-up.

You know retail is in a bad way when...

Black market trade in foodstuffs is thriving.

'We know the elephant died when he jumped off the roof. But the other guy? It's a mystery.'