Crime-fighting Strategist T-Shirts

'If you'll excuse me, my car is on fire.'

Nelson Mandela in despair over the crime rates in SA.

'What's wrong with our new shed? Nothing - I'm sat out here guarding it.'

'Well, you got the dog to protect you against criminals. Perhaps now you'll have to hire a criminal to protect you from the dog.'

"I feel like bad guys aren't as scared of me in the summer."

'What's wrong with those Europeans? We have more murders in this city than England, France Germany and Spain combined.'

"That's not a knife crime initiative. That's a knife crime initiative!"

Slow Night

Violent Crime Statistics

'I'm afraid we're going to have to let you go, Richter. The crime rate has dropped.'

"When I grow up I'm going to be a police officer and follow in my dad's footsteps."

'We want more police on our streets!' 'WHAT?! Do you have any idea how dangerous it is out there?'

"Brutus! Attack with reasonable force!"

Gullboy and Pigeonman

'Oh no! They've been pinched.'

"We can't put you in a Witness-Protection Program unless you actually witnessed something."

With his mothers persuasion, Joe decided to 'come clean' to the police!

"We're from Neighborhood Watch. We'd like to see some I.D."

"Isn't it nice to see more bobbies on the street...?"

'Ugh. Every single day.'

"While we do appreciate your diligence... It's not the store's policy to shoot shoplifters!"

"If we're the Serious Fraud Squad, how come we're looking for funny money?"

New York City, the Bronx, and another successful Vice Squad raid comes to wraps (real vices used for arresting criminals).

"Don't fall for it, Dogman!"

A Gun Proposes to Violence.

Serious Crime Squad, Light-Hearted Crime Squad, Happy As Larry Crime Squad.

"Policing's not what it was..."

Crime-Be-Gone - Fence-O-Matic!

'These police cuts have gone too far.'

'It's a vicious circle, Sarge.'