Crime Curious Gifts

"Sure her act is legal in a nightclub - but she was doing it in the street."

'Am I being too suspicious or do you think it's possible that they're crooked?'

Randall couldn't wait to see what else the 'Magic Trash Can' could make disappear.

"You say it all the time, so I climbed every tree to prove it. You were right, money doesn't grow on trees."

Nelson Mandela in despair over the crime rates in SA.

Good Cop/Bad Cholesterol

"But he had a mask and I thought he was a burglar."

"My latest sighting turned out to be just another weather balloon."

'What's wrong with those Europeans? We have more murders in this city than England, France Germany and Spain combined.'

"Don't make me warn you again, monkey. Stay outa the curiosity racket."

'You don't have a license and registration, do you?'

"I don't have my law degree yet but I've got an internship down in cell block 'D'."

The Philip Marlow family

"Excuse me ma'am, may I help you cross the road so that I can get the answer to this dumb joke my friend keeps telling?"

'When you get up on the stand be sure to keep your answers short. A whole lot of barking will only frighten the jury.'

OK! I promise that the questions will be easy!

"Don't editorialize."

'Larry liked to crack the window before bed.'

'Dad, when do I stop being a wholly owned subsidy of you and Mom?'

The government is lying to us about life on the moon phobia.

"Number 2. Step forward please."

"I felt I could make more of a difference within the system."

"Never mind what I did, Your Honor. I want to be judged for who I am, as an individual."

"Thrilling news, sweetie! The National Gallery's entire collection of Velázquez is now attributed to you."

'All I wanted to know is if that word was naughty.'

'Keep an eye on that one. He looks like a sketchy character to me.'

'Yeah, bit how does the stork get into the maternity room?'

"I'm not leading the witness; I'm winding up my segment on heinous crimes!"

Mobsters at the Beach

'You sloth and gluttony guys have it easy -- I'm here for envy!'

'During the break, my client stole my wallet.'

The evidence destroyed

"See what you get for thinking outside the fishbowl!"

'According to the latest poll, 64% of the public don't pay any attention to polls...'