Creepy Crawlies Avoider Gifts

'He thinks some bugs are kind of creepy looking.

"When was the last time you exercised something other than a purchase option?"

"You need to lose 20 cable channels."

'The doctor said you need more exercise, so I've hidden the remote control.'

'I tried running once, but I kept spilling my drink.'

Dissectum Paniculata

'If God had wanted me to touch my toes, he would have put them closer to my hands!'

"Will I still be able to not exercise?"

"I considered riding my bike to work until I realized it involved pedaling and sweat."

'You need more excercize. But I'm drinking as fast as I can.'

Protestors outside an exterminator shop.

The Sedentary Dead.

The doctor told my husband to be active, but the only exercise he gets is running around looking for the TV remote.

"It's just happened again! I don't get it! Master is such a nice guy: why would the neighbours always decline his invitations?"

'I follow my doctor's orders religiously. He said for me to spend two hours a day on the tennis court.'

"I want you to drink more beer, eat more fatty foods and take less exercise."

'His electric toothbrush has gone wrong - mind you, he could use the extra exercise.'

"We have to face reality. Unless we invite people over, we will never muster the energy to clean the place."

'My Barry hates horror films.'

'I don't need to exercise to lose weight. The odor in this locker room suppressed all my appetite.'

The social isolation of the entomologist...

Young Peel worries about visiting Scotland.

'Boy, I feel sorry for those poor chumps who have to run to catch the train every day!'

'IN my fantasy league, we're not allowed to pick players from teams named after cats.'

'Just thinking about New Year's resolutions makes me tired.'

"No, Fred didn't run a TV marathon - He watched a marathon on TV."

"A parent's note excusing you from gym is sufficient, Billy...you didn't need legal representation!"

'Been coming here for years and never bumped into anyone who knows me . . . weird!'

"Sure doc, I can eat healthy tasteless food and exercise until my lungs implode. Or, you can just inject some drain cleaner into my eyeball and save us both a lot of time and trouble."

"Four out of five doctors recommend that you get up and get some exercise."

'The one thing I hate about summer - great big moths coming in at night.'