Credibility Pillows

"Flo, this is roger, an insurance man with a credibility rating of 32. Roger, Flo is a journalist, with a rating of 74."

Busy man, busy life, busy shirt.

"You keep impeccable time."

JOIN THE BOY SCOUTS HERE!, ''Trustworthy, friendly, loyal, helpful, kind, courteous, brave, thrifty, obedient and cheerful' -- This is going to look GREAT on my resume!'

"When it comes to medical malpractice, most lawyers only go for the money... ...I go for the doctor's head."

'You have no idea how hard I've gotta work just to maintain my indie cred around here!'

When it comes to health issues, I'd rather listen to a physician than a spin doctor.

"Can you teach me to really bark? I only seem to be able to yap..."

'While these products may not result in weight loss, they will result in credibility loss.'

"I didn't get anything I asked for last year so I want your acceptance of this year's list to be notarized."

'Can you get me in touch with people that own me money?'

Life stripped bare

'It's called doctor-patient confidentiality. In layman's terms, you're paying me to keep my mouth shut.'

Junk Science. (Scientist sits in lawn chair just outside of junk yard.)

'This is really going to tarnish his legacy, Al.'

Wait Brian! You forgot the little Airbus chapter!

'Naughty, nice, nice, nice, naughty, nice. This you call a business plan?'

The Return of Guarded Optimism

'Contract? No contract. We do all our business with nothing more than a handshake.'

'I must admit, I do look good in stripes.'

"But if I don't know the corporate values then I'm not accountable to them."

Owning your mistakes at work shows that you hold yourself accountable, and builds trust and credibility.

'Ms Simpson? Get me the Scapegoat du Jour.'

'A role model? Yes, I suppose he was. Everywhere he went, people would say 'That's Bill Fenton... You don't want to be that guy!''

Making Amends: I haven't harrassed anyone in weeks....My new career: I'll be a secretary....to a female executive. Women can harass em all they life. I sentence myself to house arrest for 30 days, make that 90 days.

"It makes me feel better about myself."

'I need something that will raise my energy level but not my self esteem - I'm already full of myself.'

It's more insolvent abuse from an unpaid creditor.'

'Hey, come on -- You've got to believe in yourself!'

Sandra believed honesty to be the foundation of a good relationship.

"They say you can influence people by projecting a sense of trustworthiness."

"Who cares if you misspelled a word on the blackboard? Tell you what...next time you spell a word, spell it right, turn around, and yell, 'Boom, baby!'"

"I'm trying to be myself and you're not helping."

"It's important to be authentic"

'Swimwear taketh away. Footwear giveth back.'