Creationism Commentators Pillows

'I've got nothing to wear!'

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

"And maybe throw in a talking snake to make sure they don't take it literally."

"Sure, money may be imaginary - but at least it's got everybody imagining it."

"But will it distract the public's attention enough that they mindlessly buy our products?"

The Origin of Creationism

'Since we all have to believe in something, I thought, 'Why not money?''

"At the end of the day Simon, money talks!"

"You're awfully tame this evening."

'That might work as your own personal mission statement. But what we're really shooting for here is something the whole company can get behind.'

"I'm so glad you decided to participate in our Money for Employment program."

"I'll take new members any way I can get them."

The National Institute for Advanced Talk-Show Punditry.

"What would you suggest to fill the dark, empty spaces in my soul?"

'A market ruled by only three companies is bad for the customers and it puts down development and innovation. I would be a strong opponent to such a market, if I didn't own all three companies.'

"Today the market closed at exactly the right price, and all buyers and sellers were very happy."

'I'm all tired out from creating - let's just use NATURAL selection from now on.'

'I believe in the free enterprise system. I haven't paid for anything in the past 27 years...'

We're changing from 'tried and true' to 'fly by the seat of our pants'. So, I'm afraid you're out, Tom !

'Say what you like about Capitalism, it makes the gravy train run on time.'

"What I like about intelligent design is that it explains everything will proving nothing."

Mice 25¢

'Today the stock market closed early so money managers could take time to stop and smell the profits.'

'I've begun spreading my wealth to offshore accounts.'

Evolution on the brink

Poor man and rich man

"Not only is the grass greener, but check out that Mercedes!"

"I find it helps to imagine Go as some kind of divine creator."

Weather bar

F.W. Woolworth and Karl Marx Go Into Retailing

'Palintology'

'Remember, it's not a lie if it makes us money.'