Craft Fair Fan Mugs

Home Made Jam - Jailhouse Rock

'I had a cough at the time.'

Frankenstein's monster on sale at the arts and crafts fair.

'He went in for the Worst Singer and won first prize in the Gurning competition at the same time!'

William Shakespeare a.k.a. Francis Bacon, Earl of Essex....

Fist Bumper Cars

"Be sure to check out the rides. They're free, too, with the purchase of tickets."

'Admit it, you've been laughing behind my back ever since 1957 when we went in that hall of mirrors in Skegness!'

Riding the Rollercoaster.

"You think you're gonna whack me and this will be over?"

"Oh goody! It's just like the Columbian Exposition of 1893."

'I had a cough at the time!'

Which Hogwarts house are you?

Face Painting.

'Hey, look�The carnival must be in town'

Knight with paint tin on his head.

"Step right up, lady and gents, and scoop yourself a heaping helping of the best spicy meat and bean stew this side of the mighty Mississippi!"

"It's all locally-sourced, made from scratch."

'I thought I'd cut out the middle men.'

Gardener of the Year.

Knight Supplies

Man in bumper car sees traffic cop on bumper-car style motorcycle

"Daisy, Daisy, I've seen the farmer filling in the forms: We're going to the Agricultural Show!"

"You're probably hot and I've gone on too long so I'll end with a story of the great pestilence."

Tunnel of Love Just Friends.

"Roller coaster, 30 minutes. . . Ferris wheel, 15 minutes. . . Haunted House, 45 minutes. . ."

You must be this tall and this far apart to ride

Paddlithic Period

Garrick as Richard 3rd.

Rollercoaster police chase.

'The neighbors called to complain about your armor squeaking again.'

'Arthur loves his new job with the fairground - gets a company car as well.'

'Pre-nuptial art agreement.'

Stick Your Head Out The Window

"I can’t bear the self-satisfied unless I’m self-medicated."