Cozy Parent Gifts

Soccer Uniforms

"Look Mommy, hat!"

"I’ve tried to make this as painless as possible ... clearly I’ve failed."

"He's not talking yet, but sometimes we give him peanut butter to make it look like he is."

Romance

"Mom! Don't think of me as covered with sand. Think of me as sugar coated."

'She's just great with the children.'

"Wow, these slippers are really warm!"

'Garfield has told the oil companies to go to hell.'

'I go to St. Patrick's Church, I go to St. Patrick's School, and my name is Patrick. Is it also necessary for me to eat green food?'

Dancing in pyjamas

'The kids were so sweet...'

Pappa clown views offspring in maternity window.

Dog Park / Cat Park

'I was an egg in the Easter play.'

"Whose turn is it to lick the knife?"

"Werewolves of London..."

"Have mercy on me, Mama. Have mercy on Mr. Pitiful."

"But if I don't break stuff who will?"

Baby tells other Baby to call.

'A generous layer of vaseline makes an excellent tickle repellent!'

'Where do I put the batteries?'

'If you can keep him clean for a day you can sleep in his bed tonight.'

'Care to gaze upon the peaceful blanket of snow before I send the kids out?'

"Soon you'll be sucking your thumb AND tying your shoes...they call it multitasking."

What do you want, the moon on a stick?

"You have a co-pay...two cookies and a glass of milk."

'We're playing trampoline, mom.'

'Look Daddy: I'm wearing Mummy's shoes...'

"Well, my dog cleans himself that way!"

His and Her wardrobe's

Real Estate Krisp Flakes: Location! Location! Location!

'Hi Dad. I want you to meet Mr. Hacketal, my attorney.'

Circus Act