Cozy Couple Planners Gifts

"You don't understand, Mom. Our staying in and watching TV is not the same as you and Dad staying home and watching TV in Dayton, Ohio."

"I still plan to be a cowboy when I grow up. If I'm going to service my share of the national debt, I might as well have fun doing it."

'Are you pregnant? How do you know? You look terrible!'

"Honey, I don't want to hide anything from you. I collect pictures of cats in my spare time."

"Just remember if we don't enjoy it we can claim it as a tax-deductible business meeting..."

"We have a song, but neither of us can remember it."

'We apologise for the delay to the yum-yum train.'

The Happiest Hen in Acle

Cindy's imaginary friend has the day off so the agency send over a temp to fill in.

'I still say it was a mistake having the ceremony TOO close to his stag night!'

'I will subject to certain conditions...'

"I haven't had smouldering, passionate sex for a while....could you put it in the diary for next week!"

'First item on the agenda...Throw out the agenda!!'

Customized Personal Retreats.

"Yes, a surprise engagement. Even my husband-to-be here didn't know..."

"It's a game where we roll the dice to see which destination wedding we should spend our savings on this year."

'She'll have a nasty sugar hangover tomorrow.'

'Come now - surely we can draw up this pre-nuptial agreement amicably.'

How to feel confident in love & war

'It's a very realistic set that even comes with contract specifications and outrageous bid proposals.'

Internet wedding - 'Apparently, you get a 40% discount if you marry on-line...'

Murder on the Newlywed Game.

'This dinner had everything necessary to make it perfect...Great food, candlelight, violinist... you clutching your chest after seeing the check.'

'Wait a minute -- aren't you going to read me my rights?'

"The kindergarteners have breached their classroom confines, and are headed this way. We'll be overrun within minutes. What should we do?"

"Is this the Love Boat?"

"I think I prefer a hot Italian sun on my back and a hot Italian hand on my backside..."

Gracie hatches a plan to trap Santa.

School Trip To The Beach

"Could you give me another minute? I'm not sure who's paying yet."

'But we can't go to Australia for our honeymoon, you know how my Mother hates flying!'

"Depending on how the next election plays out, we either get married at the botanical gardens or flee the country."

"Why do I always have to get the cheese?"