Cover Art Enthusiast T-Shirts

"The cover has to be such that customers can't judge the content of the book by it."

"Those are the names of your children? I went a different route...I memorized my kids' names."

"I'm just checking in from an alternate timeline to see how things are going."

Origami horse leaping out of a book about origami

'It's not that I don't want more kids Victoria, I'm worried I won't have enough skin for their names.'

"And now, with apologies to Cole Porter."

Fuzz - there's a rumor about the band that we only play Metallica covers...

"Who let the dining-room set into the liquor cabinet again?"

Sigmund Freud

The Jumping Tank

Author meets covergirl, "surely you remember me- paperback edition of your book"

"I prefer the Perry Como version."

Cutting corners can cost money.

Angry pirate looking at angry parrot (wearing diaper) on his shoulder.

Mafia machine gun case.

'Take um powders three times um day...you'll soon be back in um swing of things, Tarzan!'

"You're tattooed all over although you're not a football pro?! Man, that's cultural appropriation!"

"How about a snake or a dragon or an eagle this time? Are you sure you want another Mom tattoo, Oedipus?"

'You really do need new glasses!'

"You want art, words, or a QR code?"

'Can't you come up with something more elegant than 'Dave's Homemade Booze'?'

"You need to take a break from watching too many tennis matches."

If Only Magazine: The Pot Belly Is In!

In the off season I do temp work.

Edward Scissorhands.

Little Women in Love in the Time of Cholera

"Give the little bastards what they want!"

'We needed to take the guess work out of choosing our new site.'

'Well, I don't consider it a tattoo. I consider it a monogram.'

The Dentists By Munch

It's a very popular pub. If you ring home you can say you're at the office.

"Nice work, who did it?"

Would you have this in yellow?

Taboo Parlor Tattoo Parlor

Portrait of the Artist as a Young Invisible Man for All Seasons