Courtship Observer T-Shirts

"I could see my mating dance had caught her eye, so I put more energy into it, but I ended up sweaty and out of breath: she lost interest then. . ."

"Check it out! In nature, females are in charge...they select their mates!"

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

'When he said it would be 'me and him against the world' I had no idea everyone was already mad at him.'

"Estoy aqui abajo!" ( I'm down here!)

'You were right. We should have gotten a lap dog.'

'I admire your persistence, Melvin, but I'm in love with another woman.'

'I know you like romantic things, so I built us this love-nest. Stuck together with my own spit.'

"Pretty Maiden where art thou?"

'Good morning Miss...'

'Gosh, Cindylou, you can't judge a guy solely on how he eats spaghetti!'

The Giant Guardsman Chapters IX and x.

"If I could choose any age I'd be forty-two again. You were hot when I was forty-two."

'I didn't know our relationship was SUPPOSED to be going anywhere.'

"I was quite a successful writer once...what sort of books are you interested in?"

"To the most beautiful girl in the world... Happy Valentine's Day!"

Wildlife Refuge

'Frankly, don't bother fighting over me: I don't fancy either of you...'

"If they say 'Rubensesque' in their profile, they mean they're a Botero."

The Night is Young and you're so beautiful!

"Believe me, Alice, you didn't miss a thing. It wasn't even a party—it was a positioning event."

"You're grinding your teeth again."

'It will never work - there's too much difference in our metamorphosis.'

"your dad doesn't trust me does he?"

Nerd night out.

"See anything you fancy?"

"I've been to all his weddings."

'Hi, I'm Sheldon, and I want to speak to you about perception management!'

'Yes, I need to move: I'm starting to have a reputation on the bachelor scene here...'

'Maybe the world isn't getting less friendly, maybe you're just getting grumpier.'

Traumatized by the event, Goldilocks was never able to have a relationship with a hairy man: 'EEK!': 'This is my last blind date!'

'Where do I go to forget about men?'

"Don't play innocent with me lucky. . . I saw you sniffing around that hussy Irish setter!"

"Doc, I'm secretly worried if you improve my girlfriend's vision prescription she'll dump me when she gets her new glasses!"