Courtroom Crack-up Gifts

"Now that we've had our little laugh. Let's set a realistic bail amount!"

Trial by Media

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

"Objection, Your Honor! Alleged killer whale."

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

Questions about an old case refuse to go away. . .

I love Lawyers

'It wasn't long before Larry realized his calling as a lawyer whisperer...'

"For the sake of not being redundant, your honor, I feel that one 'bad dog' is sufficient."

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

"Now that's a win."

"He's actually my co-counsel, but you may scratch his head."

'Normally, I hate a rush to judgement - but I'm doing this case pro bono.'

"Since you have already been convicted by the media, I imagine we can wrap this up pretty quickly."

"Not guilty but prepared to settle out of court, your honour."

"Bailiff."

"You can't plead cute."

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

"We make crime pay."

"Objection, your honor, my client's feelings are being hurt."

"I must insist on my lawyer present."

"#notguilty."

'Your Honor, in order to avoid being sued, we find the defendant 'Not guilty.''

'Wow! I never before saw such a strenuous objection.'

"The jury didn't buy my defense that CEOs just want to have fun."

"The prosecution shall stop referring to the defendant as 'the alleged, totally guilty as sin guy'."

Yawning barristers in court

"Well, heck! If all you smart cookies agree, who am I to dissent?"

'The truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth in what sense?'

'Your honor, if I may digress for a moment, who does your hair?'

Justice 4 Ron

Sue The Bastards

"And finally, I implore the jury not to take my clients lack of alibi and blatant lies out of context."