Court Side Connoisseur Gifts

Local Basketball coverage: we don't miss a dribbleb

This is Lenny the leopard with the on-the-spot news.

'You wouldn't happen to be sitting on my entry to the straightest runner bean competition?'

I love Lawyers

'Normally, I hate a rush to judgement - but I'm doing this case pro bono.'

John W. Law., John W. Law Jr., Robert Law, Janet Law, Attorneys at Law

"I object!" "Overruled!"

"I've learned something in this trial. My firm needs to hire that prosecutor."

"This is my client's videotaped deposition—please be considerate and rewind after viewing."

"The prosecution shall stop referring to the defendant as 'the alleged, totally guilty as sin guy'."

Yawning barristers in court

"Well, heck! If all you smart cookies agree, who am I to dissent?"

'Billy! Set your homework aside and get down here. There's another basketball recruiter here to see you.'

"In a just world we'd have 'No Lawyer Left Behind'."

The Birth of a Lawsuit

"I've asked you not to overrule me in front of the children."

"Assisting me with this delicate procedure is Dr. Warren. He's one of the top specialists in avoiding malpractice suits."

'The Grand Jury doesn't understand me...'

'Don't blame the lawyer!'

"...And the court awards you twenty five thousand for the loss of faculty in your right arm."

"Impartiality becomes you."

Say what? Johnnie Cochran died in 2005?

'For ever 'no-no' there's a legal 'yes-yes'.'

'Bloody Cheek, that Gayle fellow criticising test cricket.'

'Every day, I'm suing better and better...'

'He followed me home, Mom. Can I sign him to a five-year, $80-million contract?..'

'At first it was a few dollars here and a few dollars there. Then I realized I'd have to pay my lawyer.'

RBG, RGB, CMYK

"Give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to sue, and he'll eat for a lifetime."

"You don't have to answer that."

"Can you recommend something for the attorney who got me everything?"

Counsel's Opinion.

Criminal Stupidness

AMERICAN CIVIL LIBERTIES UNION ACLU, HELP TAKE A BITE OUT OF LAW, 'I like it!'

'The Supreme Court found the new law constitutional, but struck it down anyway because it's politically incorrect.'