Countryside Fan Gifts

'You'll have to gather the eggs - I seem to be at the bottom of their pecking order!'

'He went in for the Worst Singer and won first prize in the Gurning competition at the same time!'

A cat has caught a cow which it is dragging through it's cat flap.

"What road do you want to dart across today?"

Walkers

Two Men Discuss Ministers.

"They’re real."

Red trousers at night - shepherd's delight.

Get on with it!

LAST-MINUTE CAMPAIGN STOP

'This'll save a couple of journeys!'

"That was definitely mine."

"So why do I feel like we're being watched?"

'You had me at OOOO-AARRR!'

Last Chance for Everything.

"Today on Escape to the Country Emily & Oliver are looking for that special little property in the Cotswolds. So what exactly's going to tick all their boxes?"

A newspaper stand in a rural area.

For every moment in life there is a song that describes it perfectly.'

"Well, the hills were alive with the sound of music...I'm sure!"

'You're stampeding yourself! You're stampeding yourself!'

"What do you mean I eat as though I was born in a barn? I WAS born in a barn."

"Excuse me sir, is this the environment..?"

Life is simpler in the sticks.

Too posh for Alderley Edge!

'What a view! The motivational poster doesn't do it justice.'

"Have you ever actually seen a chicken cross the road?"

"Don't panic Daisy dear. You can relax your buttocks, it's not the vet, it's the chimney sweep."

"Let me guess...you forgot to put their hand-brakes on!"

Stunt Fly flying through a cow.

Fancy Wallpaper in a Cell

A chicken coop goal.

Scrooge McCow

His days are spent among the purple loosestrife and wild Iris....where the air is heavy with the scents of earth and water.

"I have a sweet pad and thirteen girlfriends. Can't beat a chicken's life."

"This is nice. Just you, me, Buster and a landscape by Andrew Wyeth."