Countryside Fan Gifts

'You'll have to gather the eggs - I seem to be at the bottom of their pecking order!'

'He went in for the Worst Singer and won first prize in the Gurning competition at the same time!'

A cat has caught a cow which it is dragging through it's cat flap.

"What road do you want to dart across today?"

Walkers

"They’re real."

Two Men Discuss Ministers.

Get on with it!

LAST-MINUTE CAMPAIGN STOP

'This'll save a couple of journeys!'

"That was definitely mine."

For every moment in life there is a song that describes it perfectly.'

'You had me at OOOO-AARRR!'

A newspaper stand in a rural area.

"Today on Escape to the Country Emily & Oliver are looking for that special little property in the Cotswolds. So what exactly's going to tick all their boxes?"

Last Chance for Everything.

'You're stampeding yourself! You're stampeding yourself!'

"What do you mean I eat as though I was born in a barn? I WAS born in a barn."

"Excuse me sir, is this the environment..?"

"Have you ever actually seen a chicken cross the road?"

Too posh for Alderley Edge!

'What a view! The motivational poster doesn't do it justice.'

"Don't panic Daisy dear. You can relax your buttocks, it's not the vet, it's the chimney sweep."

"Let me guess...you forgot to put their hand-brakes on!"

Ray Price, Willie Nelson, Merle Haggard

"I have a sweet pad and thirteen girlfriends. Can't beat a chicken's life."

A chicken coop goal.

Stunt Fly flying through a cow.

Fancy Wallpaper in a Cell

His days are spent among the purple loosestrife and wild Iris....where the air is heavy with the scents of earth and water.

Pastoral Choirs

Scrooge McCow