Country Fair Gifts

Down On the Farm

'Here you go, kid! A worm.'

'He went in for the Worst Singer and won first prize in the Gurning competition at the same time!'

I DATED A GUY FROM THE FAIR, BUT . . .

Hay Rides $10

"Be sure to check out the rides. They're free, too, with the purchase of tickets."

'It's the same everywhere: body over brains.'

'I'm sorry, your cheese has not matured enough!'

'Must really be a terrible headache you've got there, Doctor.'

Highlights From The Annual Central Park Country Fair

Abstract expressionist face painting.

'Details of the summer fete can be found on our website. The address is on the notice board at the back of the church.'

tnl of lv

'For the last time, Megan, she won a blue ribbon at the Imperial Valley Fair... I mean, my hands are tied here.'

You can always tell animals trained by 4H kids.

Prune Eating Contest: Last Man Standing.

'Are you sure its a purbred?'

I'm no longer welcome at the county fair.

"Can we discuss this?"

"Daisy, Daisy, I've seen the farmer filling in the forms: We're going to the Agricultural Show!"

Mrs. Fergensun unfortunately was crushed before getting what would surely have been a prize winning tomato to the county fair.

'We did it, Dad! We won the heaviest frog award!'

"Iowa is super diverse. We have hot dogs, corn dogs, cheese dogs, chili cheese dogs..."

Disappointed Vultures. Mexican. Vegan. Pizza. Sliders. Indian. Sushi. BBQ. The ad said "Street Food," I just assumed there'd be roadkill here.

There's nothing like a bit of bunting to draw you in!

'Oh no, the Gradwells are here with their homemade wine!'

State Fair. Fun. You won a ribbon in the eating contest? What for? Honorable munchin'!

'I knew she was a kicker.'

"I don't want to worry you, but this years prize winning pig, usually ends up as next years prize winning sausages."

“It’s the same everywhere: body over brains.”

'Well, once it's won the prize for Biggest Marrow I shall expect you to replace my fence!'

"You'll love it. This year, we created an amazing maize maze."

Things at the state fair that can give you heartburn...

Too-Humble Pie.

"I don't care about winning. I care about being the best cow I can be."